Your first step is sitting down with them and asking the hard questions – which will be difficult for both them and you – and very detailed ones. Here, in our caring for aging parents checklist, are some of the more important topics to discuss.
You will need to know the details of your parents’ finances to help them manage their care and their daily lives – especially if your assistance will extend to bill paying and other financial aspects of their daily lives. Details you need to be made aware of include:
Information on all accounts, including checking, savings, CDs and investment accounts
Contact information for any financial advisors they work with
Details of retirement and Social Security benefits, as well as any other sources of income
A detailed list of monthly expenses
It is important to know what types of insurance your parents hold and how they can be helpful at this time of their lives. It is also important to know what their limitations are and to be sure that they are updated with current information. To be well-informed on these issues, you will need to locate and go over the details of policies with your parents, including:
Any health insurance policies that are in place, including private insurance, Medicare and Medicaid
Long term care insurance
Life insurance
Auto insurance
Homeowners insurance
Knowing what legal documents your parents have in place, where they are kept and whether or not they reflect their current wishes and intentions is important. Questions you should ask include:
Do they have a will and/or an estate plan?
Do they have a living will, health care directive or a power of attorney for health care?
Do they have a power of attorney for finances?
Finding out how they feel about their current living arrangements and what changes they may accept should their current home become impractical for their needs is also essential. Considerations to discuss with them include:
Does their current home meet their needs?
Is it safe and livable?
Are there modifications or updates that could make their lives easier or safer in their current home?
Would they be open to moving if their current home does not meet their needs now or may not in the future?
Last, but certainly not least, you will need to know as much as possible about your parents’ health/medical situation. Important details to ask about include:
The names and contact information of any physicians, specialists or other health care providers they are using
Details on medical conditions, treatments, medications and so on
Will they allow you to be brought into the loop (legally) via direct communication with their health care team?
All of these topics on our caring for aging parents checklist are essential ones to discuss. However, if they are difficult for you or your parents to handle, you don’t necessarily have to cover them all in one sitting.